Surgery

April 15 was my fourth surgery since my original diagnosis of breast cancer.  This surgery was a much happier one then the others because it was to restore my femininity.  That's right, reconstruction.  Humpty Dumpty got to get put back together again and though it hurts it is a much less painful process than the mastectomy was.

looks like a shop-vac attachment

got to have my sweetie by my side for 24 hours straight

no big complications with surgery...except for a mild reaction to the anasthetic which caused major itching and low oxygen.  Some benadryl took care of that

Moving

Since our inspiring conference get-away last weekend I've been in tears everyday--and I'm not someone who cries easily.  I would love to say the tears are from recalling all the tender mercies and inspirational messages given at conference but they are honestly from the heartache of knowing I will soon be leaving this place that I've come to love so much.  On Sunday we officially accepted a job that will land us back in Utah in June.  We have prayed and prayed about this opportunity and as much apprehension I have about moving to a new place while still undergoing cancer treatment and leaving the amazing support system and cherished friendships I have in St Louis--we feel the Lord is guiding us this direction.  I just wish it didn't have to be so hard.  We LOVE St Louis and its people and how they have carried our family through this cancer journey.  How can I leave these good people especially before I have had the chance to repay all the service they have done for our family?  I don't understand and every time I think about it I become a blubbering mess all over again.  I really don't want to leave!!!  Why does this one have to be so hard?  I keep doubting my answer because I think if this was really the Lord's will then it wouldn't be so painful--that I would just be excited about the job opportunity for Kelly and the chance to be closer to family.  When I remind myself of the beautiful experiences we had in Salt Lake (i.e. running into our mission president/ being fed lunch by perfect strangers) after praying if this was the right direction for our family then I have courage to go forward.  I'm SO grateful for the time the Lord has granted us to get to know this lovely place and people.  Our memories here will be cherished forever.

Poor Haela

So Haela has done remarkably well the past 3 years and has NOT been hospitalized for her asthma until, of course, this year....what a whirlwind!  Not only did she land herself in the hospital but in the intensive care unit with VERY stubborn asthma.  It started with a slight respiratory cold, then an exposure to cats (which she can handle in small doses normally), then a major change in weather along with going a week without her daily inhaler (we found this out later as she explained her inhaler fell under her bed and when she would remember to take it the lights were already out and she was scared of reaching underneath and finding some goblin/monster/spider/ or other unknown creature).  BAD mix!  So after 7 hours in the E.R. they admitted her into the PICU.  Luckily this girl always seems to turn a corner on the 2nd-3rd day.  I guess her magic number is 3 because that is ALWAYS how long she ends up staying in the hospital.  At first I thought, "Really?  She's been clear for 3 years and NOW is the time she flares up?  Right when I start feeling good again from intense surgery and aggressive chemotherapy???"  Then I realized it's all in how you look at it.  She got sick as soon as I was really starting to feel strong again and that was truly a blessing.  If it would have been two weeks sooner that she nose-dived I wouldn't have been ready to help her.  Instead, the Lord allowed me to be feeling good again before this happened and I felt strong enough.  I was able to dote on her and wait on her and give her everything a mother wants to do when her child is really sick and that was such a blessing.

Plus, she got room service, endless movies, and good bonding time with both me and Kelly....but we are SO grateful she bounced back quickly.  Love that girl!